Memorial Day

Memorial Day was really nice this year. There was a lot less fighting than last year! Haha and yes, we spent it with the same people! Spencer's brother Mike decided to host a barbeque at his house, so we all went over there. I made sure Evie was covered up from the sun, and she was very patriotic!

she sneers like Elvis

I actually had a really good time. I was able to stay calm for the most part (with help) and enjoy being there instead of letting every little thing get under my skin and freak me out. It took some doing but I kept my head on straight and enjoyed myself. Evie had a great time! She had fun seeing her grandparents-especially her grandpa. She had lots to say to him!

Today Evie is officially four months old. She's still so small though. She's 10 pounds 15 ounces; about the size of the average 7-week-old. The time has absolutely flown by. I knew it would. Everyone told me it would. But I'm still kind of surprised. Every morning I wake up thinking "How am I going to do this?" and every night when I go to bed it's "Wow, somehow I did it." Every day I manage surprises me, and yet in many ways it's a lot easier than I thought it would be. Evie is such an easy baby. She's so good. She goes to sleep in her crib, eats well, doesn't spit up. We haven't even had a diaper blowout yet (fingers crossed). She's just everything I wanted in a baby. The tricky part is, I don't want any more kids. Just the one. But I want to be pregnant again. I LOVED being pregnant. So how do I make that work? Maybe I'll become a surrogate. Hey, if there's anyone out there who wants kids but doesn't want to get pregnant, I'll carry 'em for ya! Now you think I'm joking, but honestly it's something I'm considering for down the road. I am absolutely obsessed with being pregnant. Unfortunately, I'm obsessed to the point where I'm actually talking to a therapist about it because it interferes with my life. If it were up to me I'd be pregnant again right now. But I don't want any more children. How do I make that work? Anyway, the point is, I'm doing everything I can to do well. And I think I am. It's one day at a time, but let's face it, two or three days at a time isn't an option. I just keep putting one foot in front of the other and somehow I just keep making it through.